Centre of attention

On Monday I took myself off to the Hackney Picturehouse to watch people talk about their experiences of being the centre of attention hosted by Spark London.

When I walked into the unfamiliar building and was told to get in a life and go right up to the top floor-the attic- I was a bit dubious.

I went to the toilet first as I am a woman and it is important to check out the facilities when somewhere new. Be it a theatre, a restaurant or a friend’s house. A toilet says a lot about a place/person, but if anyone wants to come to mine I will need a phone call about an hour before, I don’t want anyone thinking I live in a pigsty when it is obviously the kids.

Back to the Attic -I feared the centre of attention was going to be on me the following day by way of a newspaper front page. The light in the toilet went out leaving me in the dark mid flow, and the creepy music playing didn’t help my imagination go full throttle and convince me there was someone lurking in the next cubical with a Scream mask on. It was a good job I was already in the toilet else I would have wet myself.

Thankfully I walked out of the loo with my jugular still intact and I went to watch people speaking about being centre of attention. At the start of the evening everyone was a bit reluctant to take part- it was an open mike night but I think we all thought we were there to be entertained by other people.

I sure as hell wasn’t going to get up there, maybe one day I will have the guts. Next week the talk is ‘nature’. Hmmm, I could think up a few naturist experiences I have had I’m sure, but speaking in front of an audience and feeling naked is a completely different kettle of fish.

The centre of attention stories were funny, random and interesting. Though I am gutless and didn’t get up on the night, I have been thinking about when I have been the centre of attention.

After a hell of a lot of thinking I found recently in the past few years I haven’t really been the centre of attention, not in a bad way just I have been going along in life without it really happening.

However, when I was younger around 8/9/10/11... ok up until my late teens, I used to always want to be the centre of attention -with boys.

There was a boy in my brother’s year that I used to live a couple of houses away from. Me, my brother and his brothers all used to play together. I liked him – a lot. So I tried to get his attention – a lot.

In school I used to get friends to go and get him to him because I wanted to speak with him, or because I was upset, or because, just because. Needless to say, he did not always come running. We used to play in my back garden (not a euphemism) I used to not do as he told me purposely to make him pay more attention to me, nothing drastic just silly little things.

I also used to run away from weddings a lot (something I did in later life too). My ‘husband’ would be waiting for me at one end of the playground and then there was me at the other. When the crucial moment came, I would send my friends to tell him I didn’t want to marry him while I happily ate my ketchup and butter sandwich.

Another boy attention moment I remembered while writing this was having three rings from 3 different boys when I was about seven. I lost two of them in straw bales in the school field, the third didn’t last much longer before being lost in the abyss of the bale.

Sadly as I have got older the treat them mean keep them keen has not always worked, especially after a bottle of wine. (Why do women get soooo mean on wine? I would blame the sugar but we don’t get angry on chocolate. Oh no, bloody love that sugary stuff.)

The below are some other times I have been the centre of attention....

When I had a panic attack in PE class (I know I have told you a hundred times).

When some boy threw a stick against a tree and a bit flew into my face and got stuck there.

When I thought I was a badass and tried to climb on a beach shelter and broke my wrist.

When I gate crashed a house party and had to be taken to hospital after drinking too much. (Should apologise to my brother and his frien- who had the party- for that again. Sorry!)

When I fell over and smashed a microwave with my head (The glass bit- I was fine thankfully and so was my glass of wine.)

In France when I said I didn’t want tequila because I would be sick but had a shot anyway then threw up all over the bar, and was then told to clean it up. So did and then fell over in the toilet, then went back to my cabin had a shower and pole danced for the rest of the night. – The party don’t stop when I throw up.

When I was giving birth, there were a lot of nurses prodding my centre of attention.

Well, best get off and make some memories to add to the bullet points! Maybe minus the wine though.

Dear Milk Tray Man

Dear Milk Tray Man,

I would like to thank you from the bottom of my chocolate covered heart for bringing the best box of Milk Tray out into the world.

Yesterday I was shopping in Superdrug picking up a few essentials, facemasks, vitamins, tampons, etc, when I saw some boxes of Milk Tray.

I am on a diet, so I tried to turn away from them but silly me- I’m a woman so I always NEED chocolate.

I looked at the back of the box to see what different chocolates there were, I was so excited when I saw new flavours including a truffle, salted caramel charm and the best one- apple crunch.

Looking at the box brought my attention to the fact that there are nowhere near enough apple flavoured chocolate delights, and I was hoping that you were going to sort that problem out.

I peeled open the box carefully to be greeted by a minuscule square chocolate in the middle of the box. As it was supposed to be the centre piece I was shocked at just how small it was.

I am not one to always say ‘bigger is better’ but this is a case where I feel it is appropriate to say it.

Unfortunately I had a clay face mask on at the time of eating said chocolates, so I couldn’t even open up my mouth wide enough to convey how astounded I was at the size. Not that anyone could have seen me anyway because I was in my bunk bed with curtains around it in a hostel in London, but that is not the point.

I hope this does not make you feel inadequate, but I thought I should bring it to your attention.

However, I will add the truffle was an absolute delight and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Good day to you, keep doing whatever it is that you do Mr Milk Tray.

Kind regards,
Miss Frew.

(Evidence)

How to get rid of blackheads

(Sorry about the scary picture.)

Since living in London, I have broken out with teeny tiny blackheads all over my face. They are devils, I have to physically restrain myself from digging the buggers out because I know if I do it will only create a bigger problem and I will be left with a face that will look like I have been attacked by a bear. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and I have been trying to fight the blackheads with my own beauty regime. In a hostel, walking around with a facemask and a bowl of boiling water is not something that happens every day. I am the weird one here, I believe that is safe to say. Well, beauty comes before funny looks so I have created a 5 step plan to get rid of blackheads and keep my fellow hostel buddies amused.

Step 1 – Steam

This one takes some waitressing skills, as the walk from the kitchen to the toilet is quite far. Nonetheless this step is the most basic but the best way to rid my face of blackheads. I simply make sure I have a towel, boil the kettle, get a bowl and fill it with boiling water. Then carefully walk down the corridor with it and into the toilet, lock the door and sit on the toilet with the towel over my head and my face hovering above the bowl.
The steam from the water opens pores to make the buggers know they are not welcome on my face. I have sat for up to 10 minutes in the toilet steaming, but if someone is desperate for the loo I sacrifice about a minute.

Step 2 - Scrub

Step two is my favourite as scrubbing away the dirt and grime from the underground after a long day is always satisfying. This Deep Clean blackhead exfoliator with papaya and licorice for less than a fiver, is a blackhead buster must-have. The licorice and willow bark help fight bacteria and the papaya makes skin look healthy and radiant. This polishes up my skin a treat.


http://www.goodthingsbeauty.com/skincare.php £4.99


Step 3 – Mask

This chocolate orange self heating mask is an absolute wonder, it is infused with dark chocolate and orange oil and is almost good enough to eat (I found out you should not eat this mask, it does not taste as good as it sounds). It warms up as soon as it is put in contact with skin, which is a delicious curious feeling, I received equally curious looks when after putting it on behind the comfort of my curtained bunk bed I had to emerge with clay all over my face, hair and neck. I didn’t have a mirror in my cubby hole. I didn’t care and I will be following my regime every week so I will get used the the funny looks aimed my way.

This chocolate orange mask is 99p from Superdrug, get one before I buy them all!

Step 4 - Cleanse

Seaweed is one of the ‘superfoods’ this year, but I can’t bear the thought of putting it in my mouth, so I have compromised and have put it on my face and around my mouth instead. The Body Shop has a seaweed range and I really love this seaweed purifying facial cleanser. It makes my skin feel cleansed deep down and gets rid of every single bit of dirt and grime. I cleanse again after using a face mask because it just makes my face feel super clean, and helps with my battle to keep the blackheads at bay.

Thebodyshop.co.uk £9.50

Step 5 – Moisturise

I LOVE coconut oil, it really is the best thing that has ever been invented. It has so many uses which I don’t even have the time to begin to go into but believe me, it can be used for pretty much anything. For the purpose of this blog, I will tell you the main place I use it is on my face. I smother myself in it day and night so of course for my final step in getting rid of blackheads, the ultra moisturising coconut oil is always going to be my favourite thing to use.

It starts off as a solid, then after some gentle warming in between the palm it turns into a silky smooth liquid. It has made such a difference to my skin since I started using it, I barely get spots anymore and dry patches are a thing of the past.
Because I am a bargain hunter (ok a cheapskate), I usually just get whatever is on offer in town. The best thing about it is, supermarkets sell it because it can also be used for cooking. Next time you are doing your weekly shop, pop it in your trolley and try it. Let your skin absorb it, which it does relatively quickly as with any standard moisturiser, and say hello to beautiful skin.

Optional step...

Eat a whole box of Milk Tray. Because I LOVE Milk Tray and it was £2.00 in Superdrug and had new flavours such as ‘apple crunch’ and ‘salted caramel charm’. If you have some self restraint you can avoid eating them all, if like me you don’t, eat them all and enjoy every single one. There is also a chocolate orange flavour which matches with the mask perfectly so I don’t eat my face.

Blackheads busted.

Rabbit hole: Every parents nightmare

To save myself from the drama of getting lost this evening I decided to go to the Hampstead theatre, a five minute walk from my hostel to watch a play called 'Rabbit Hole'.

I bagged myself a spot in the front row (I am getting pretty good at that now), and took in my surroundings.

The set was amazing and I nearly asked one of the staff if I could have the fitted kitchen when the play was over. (I didn't but if the set director is reading this, please email me and I will send my home address for you to send it to.) There were hidden rooms which appeared out of the darkness throughout the evening which brought a new dimension to the play that I haven't seen in theatre before.

When the characters first came onto the stage I recognised Becca the lead actress and realised she played the mother in 'Outnumbered' (Claire Skinner). She was standing literally about 2 feet away from me and I could see every blink of her eyes and breath she took. Something shifted in me, I had never felt such an emotional connection with a character straight away.

All of the actors and actresses conveyed every emotion perfectly, being so close to them meant I could literally look into their eyes and if they had faltered I would have seen it straight away. They were all so beautifully on point, I was close to tears more times than I care to admit.

If I had known what the play was about, I don't think I would have come, it would have been too much. However, I am so glad I walked in tonight not expecting anything because it made me completely connect with everything, it was very over-powering.

The acting was impeccable and the hard hitting story line is the nightmare for every parent, I am not going to give too much away but I will let you know the characters took us on a journey with them through their grief.

The acting from all on stage was so immense that I truly felt every word they said. It was absolutely incredible.

I am hoping I can handle watching it again as it is one of the most hard-hitting and beautiful productions I have ever seen.

Now I have to go to bed as I am emotionally drained, but in a good way.

Local business interview- Beth Emery from WordChatter

Are you a sniffer? 

I don't know about you, but I simply cannot walk past a candle stall at an event and not stop and have a sniff. 

Recently, I have discovered the absolutely thrilling and tantalising candles of WordChatter. 

I recently met Beth Emery while she was on Worthing Seafront selling her candles on the August Bank holiday. After sticking my nose into practically all of her candles, I had to stick my nose into her business...

Tell me when and why you started your business WordChatter? 

I started WordChatter in October 2014 so we're not quite a year old yet. I broke my foot in April 2014 and being a self employed photographer had to put everything on the back burner (long story but my foot didn't heal on it's own and now I have titanium holding it together! I only started to walk on it again in October 2014). WordChatter started out life as a design business that made word cloud pictures of special events or people, or animals, you know the kind of thing I'm talking about? Well it all developed from there and we started making soy candles because we love them. Now our business is mainly soy candles as it's taken off really well. 

What were your first steps when setting up WordChatter? 

First steps is a funny question as when I first started WordChatter I couldn't put weight through my actual foot! ... Anyway I first started like I said in the previous question by designing Word Clouds (which we still do - bespoke to order). But now the soy candles are the main part of the business. 

What are the benefits of using soy wax rather than any other wax?

There are plenty of benefits to using soy wax. We only use 100% soy wax, no blends or paraffin. Paraffin wax is made from crude oil and is not a sustainable product. Soy wax is made from the oil of soy beans which is a completely renewable source. The beans themselves are hulled and processed, the oil is hydrogenated and this makes the wax solid and room temperature. Soy wax candles also last around twice as long as paraffin equivalents. Believe me I've tried and tested! Soy wax also burns cleaner than paraffin. 

Where do you get your inspiration for new candle scents? 

I listen to my customers, I introduced my Cafe Creme (coffee, vanilla and caramel - with actual coffee beans in the candles) fragrance after a customer told me she had been unable to get a decent coffee candle in the UK. The addition of the coffee beans means the coffee scent gets stronger the longer you burn the candle as the beans heat up in the wax and release their own fragrance. 

(Photo- Candy Floss and Bow Ties photography.) 

What is you favourite scent? Oooo now this is a difficult one for me.. I do have my favourites... But I love all of the candles I make. Currently I have an addiction to my Candy Canes candles as it actually smells like a stick of rock.... delicious! 

What is your most popular scent? 

By far it's Lemongrass and Ginger.. I can't seem to make enough of it. It's a really fresh scent with the lemongrass and has a huge zing from the ginger. Nothing is even close to that one in terms of sales. 

Have you tried a scent and decided against it? (If yes, why?) I've discontinued one scent as I wasn't happy with it, I will only keep making something if it sells (not just because I like it - there's only so much room in my house for candles!). I will introduce new ones and see how they fair... but to be honest there is only so much room on a table when you are out selling ... I currently (including Christmas) have 30 fragrances. It's a challenge to get them all out! 

What is the most unusual scent you make? Maybe Lemon Drizzle Cake, it actually smells like cake and a few people have said it smells good enough to eat! I have one candle called Nutty Delight (which I absolutely love - it's a very sweet scent of walnut, pecan, vanilla and sugar) I call it my marmite candle as people either love it or hate it... there never ever seems to be an in-between. 

Aside from your candles, what are the other most popular gifts that you sell? Coasters and key-rings always sell well. Mug sets at Christmas time too (which can be personalised). Wedding prints sell well, word clouds of the details of the wedding. 

What has been your most rewarding moment? Returning customers, people who actually seek to find me at a fair and say how lovely the candles are and buy more. It's what it's all about. I love candles, I love making candles and I love that my customers love my candles! 

Who or what inspires you? I would love to thank Alan Sugar (strange I know) .. but the whole candle making idea came from an episode of The Apprentice last summer. I thought "I can do that" and I have been fully supported by Helen my partner throughout the whole experience.

  

What is the best part about running WordChatter? Meeting lots of people who are fanatical about candles! I've met quite a few (including you Becky!) who just love candles. I love getting out to as many fairs and events as possible and chatting with people about what they like and don't. People are so different and fascinating. 

What are your future plans for WordChatter? I am going to see where it takes me... I would love to get into a few small independent shops to begin with and develop from there. 

What events have you got coming up that we can catch you at? I have loads booked in the diary between now and Christmas. This weekend I will be at Findon Sheep Fair on Saturday 12th and Sunday sees me back at the Pavilion in Worthing from 10am - 4pm. I always post up on my facebook page during the week where I will be that weekend so you can always keep a track of me by jumping across to my page www.facebook.com/wordchatter and you can also sign up for my newsletter which will keep you up to date with what is going on.

What are you waiting for? Stop reading, log onto www.wordchatter.co.uk and find your own favourite WordChatter candle or gift. 

Or if you fancy having a get together with your friends contact Beth on the WordChatter Facebook page or website and arrange a date to have a candle party at home! 

(Photo- Candy Floss and Bow Ties photography.) 

5 things to tell your daughter

I have been having some worries recently about Scarlett being a teenage mum, in fact that is a lie- I have always thought she is going to become one. Sometimes we just have this feeling in the pit of our stomach and that is what is in the pit of mine.

She may be six now but I am going to blink and she will be 13 and interested in BOYS! I say that, but she has always been interested in boys, they have caught her eye ever since she was a baby.

Obviously it is because of her stunning looks that I gave her, blonde hair, blue eyes, sweet innocent looking face...

I am short, with black/brown/red/grey hair and brown eyes...

#'@#"££4 - PICTURE UNAVALIABLE - #**&*( - COMPUTER SAID NO _ @~'#'##'23%

Going on holiday with a child who looks nothing like you, and who has a different surname is an immigration nightmare -but we do have the same nose! (Don’t worry I have started saving up for her rhinoplasty already.)

So, due to me not wanting to be a grandmother by the time I am 40, I have come up with some things I am going to tell her when she becomes a teenager.

I will wake her up on the day she turns 13 with a smile and this list......Happy Birthday Baby!

I thought I would share them with you just in case you would like to share my pearls of wisdom...

You know nothing

Yes, I know we have had this argument ever since you were about two and you thought that you ruled the world like some kind of mini Mariah Carey, but I would like to inform you...YOU KNOW NOTHING. I love you but knowing who is number one in the charts (If it is called a chart now, I wrote this in 2016 so I am sure a lot will have changed, everything apart from YOU KNOW NOTHING.) You have so much to learn about life, there is so much to see and do. Travel, follow your dreams, discover who you are, live, laugh, love. YOU KNOW NOTHING, apart from that I love you unconditionally and I will keep you in pocket money until you are 30 if you don’t get pregnant when you are a teenager.

I mean proper pocket money, not the £1 that the tooth fairy gave you when your first tooth fell out when you were six. I can still see the disappointment on your face at the lack of money she had left. I told her off after that and she vowed to only leave paper money after that.
You did have a good argument when you said monopoly money was not real money but I think she got confused.

Meet Ann Summers, your best friend

I hope you have grown up feeling able to talk to me about anything, I have probably grossed you out so much about the topic of sex that you don’t want to go near a boy but just in case, I would like to introduce you to Ann Summers. While you are a bit young yet, I just want you to bare her in mind for when the time comes and a boy gives you a wink and a nudge. It will never be like he says it is. I don’t know what you will be taught in school, probably not a lot apart from what a condom looks like but it really will not be worth it. Do something better with your time like read a book or brush your teeth, just stay away from the boy because he is a liar. That is all I will say on the subject because at the time of writing this you are at Rainbows and playing happily like a little girl should, and that is all I want in my head right now.

Just remember Ann Summers.

Alcohol: Your friend and nemesis

Alcohol has always been around you, I have not been one of those parents who has ever hidden it from you. Why should I, it is not a bad thing....well, not always. I am still learning about alcohol, I am currently 26 and when you read this you I will be 33 and more than likely still learning. Unless I have become T-total. Hahahahahahahahaha, yeah right. I have had many an episode with alcohol, I could have even had my own TV show with all of the episodes I have had. They are all mostly fun, but you do have to beware – the demon drink can live up to being just that, a demon. You will have your own trials and tribulations with it over the next few years, I am not going to pretend that I think you will not touch alcohol until you are 18, unless that is your choice, but you are my daughter so I highly doubt that would cross your mind.

Though I can see us as being like Eddie and Saffy from ‘Absolutely Fabulous’ (Google it darling, or if Google is not around use whatever you can to find out about it. We may have gone back to pigeon mail so if that is the case go and get a pigeon), You would be all sensible and I would be strutting around swigging from a champagne bottle thinking I was still 26. I am quite the pro when it comes to alcohol so even if it is 3am in the morning and you are completely ratted, call me. I will send a taxi to come and get you. What? I will have been on the bubbles darling.

The best mantra to live by

‘Everything happens for a reason.’ If you apply that to every crappy thing that happens in your life, I guarantee you will feel better about everything.

You: ‘My dress for the school disco hasn’t arrived!’

Me: ‘What are we going to do about it?

You: ‘Well everything happens for a reason, so never mind. We can go into town and you can buy me a new one, along with a diamond necklace to make me feel better.’

Me: ‘Um, ok.’

I can’t guarantee the diamonds unless my career has panned out how I am hoping it will in my head. If it has then you will have a million dresses and anything you could ever want. Actually wait, I don’t want you to be even more of a spoilt brat so you can have 999,999 dresses and one diamond necklace as long as I can borrow it whenever I want.

If things haven’t panned out and we are living in a cardboard box then, well....’everything happens for a reason.’

Respect Johnny Depp

He is your idol, no arguments. YOU KNOW NOTHING.

Johnny Depp is an amazing actor, an amazing man and your father. I am just kidding, calm down. I am pretty sure that he would get a restraining order against me if I went anywhere near him, I just wanted to touch him a little bit but his security people were not too happy with that. I would be ok with just a little poke, just a little shove to let him know I am there, hopefully you have not opened this while I am in prison. If I am not then we will have a marathon Johnny Depp film day. We will watch anything and everything he has been in, including 21 Jump Street. He may have only been in it for about 5 minutes but he stole the film. Or was that me?

Again, I am not being serious, those days are behind me- which reminds me theft is not a good hobby to have when you are a teenager. Just a reminder. It will not look good on your CV.

Life lessons over, let’s go and party!

Happy birthday! xxx

Oh and just to embarrass you that little bit more...