There must be something in the air, 2 days ago I was asked if I was pregnant, I recoiled in horror and said no, but thanks...
Today I was looking at baby feet button art and the bloke said,
'Do you know what you are having? Boy or girl?'
Much to my annoyance, I told him that I was in fact NOT pregnant, but thanks anyway.
Thinking about it though, my boobs have got bigger (#asdabra), and my tummy is defiantly more muffiny than usual. Though, that could be due to the 2 Mc Donald's breakfasts that I ate this morning.
It would be virtually impossible to have conceived, I've been single for 5 months and have only had one indescretion...no, 2 indescretions, actually maybe 3. Let's just say I have had less than a handful of intimate moments in the past 5 months and it just wouldn't be possible.
I'm hardly Samantha from sex and the city, bonking everything that moves but I'm also not Jane the virgin either- just an explication for those of you open mouthed and counting the fingers on your hand thinking 'how many?!'
However, the next time someone asks if I am pregnant (which will probably be tomorrow), I'm going to say,
'Yes, I am. I'm due in 3 months and I'm going to call him lucifer, good day to you.'
Then I will go and sob into an extra large margarita, the pizza not the drink. Actually, maybe the drink would be better.
On a lighter note, my business cards arrived today...
I do love them and at least it looks more professional than me scribbling my name on a bit of paper if I feel the urge to interview someone for a blog post.
I was thinking about rebranding and calling myself 'The Spinster Yummy Mummy' but I would have to get new business cards and the ones I bought cost me over 20 quid, so for the foreseeable future I will still be single.
Single and pregnant looking...but doesn't the Asda bra work...
Ah, there is a silver lining.
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